yoakemae | 夜明け前

Being the geek that I am, no one ever expects me to *cough* flirt (or to flirt WELL) with guys. In fact, they only expect me to be uber-impervious to population XY, having crushes or so. Well, sad to say, I *am* pretty impervious to crushes in the sense that I don’t fall in love or something the minute I see someone fit (i.e. Zac Efron – sorry, girls) and that I personally don’t take it as my “duty” to flirt with every guy that comes my way.

…at least, I have a rule: Don’t “flirt” with people I don’t know.

I think it really depends on what you classify as the dirty deed – some people do it with coy stares, the kind of stuff you see on the silver screen and all. On the other hand, pre-teens (they grow up SO fast) I’ve spoken to will say that flirting is when a guy gives a girl excessive compliments – yes, I’m quoting verbatim(!)

Moi? Well, I usually don’t tend to do the (dreaded) deed with people I don’t know. To me, flirting’s just exchanging very playful and fun banter with good mates – it *may* border on slightly suggestive stuffo (only with the close ones), but it rarely does happen. As for new people that I meet, I’m just usually friendly around them. There’s no need to start getting “flirty” until you know them better, IMO. And physical flirting? Overrated…(for now at least.)

So it came as a surprise to my friends and I when I ventured out of my comfort zone yesterday. Let me bring you up to speed:

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Now our boarding house has a custom where we rent DVDs from Blockbusters every weekend for our movie nights – and usually they’re picked up by any boarder in the house who happens to be going down to town and won’t mind picking the DVDs up. So a few weeks ago I went down with Sidi to pick a selection of 4 DVDs – if I’m not wrong, He’s Just Not That Into You and Bride Wars were in there. So once we were done picking, I brought them to the counter whilst Sids went to have a look at the clearance CDs.

In the meantime, however, I just beamed at the attendant behind the counter and politely wished him a good afternoon. Whilst he went to get the actual discs to place inside the dummy boxes (anyone who’s been to Blockbusters or rented DVDs will get my drift), I noticed that him and the other attendant were in some weird clothing get-up: red and white football kit, complete with shorts, knee-high white socks and all that jazz.

Thinking that the outlet must’ve been supporting Manchester United at some football match, I just happened to quip – “Is there some big game going on today?” Result: I got a wink and a smile, with him explaining how Blockbusters were running a charity drive (I think it was for Child’s Play or something…and that the odd clothing was part of the publicity for it. “Care to donate?” he asked me.

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It’s Summer half term at the moment and I’m currently lodging at Jenny’s – the linen lady who works at the boarding house I stay at during term time. I’ve got much to be thankful for (I’m using her internet now, if you can’t tell. xD) Now I’ve known Jenny for nearly 2 years now; this isn’t the first time I’ve been at hers, and I know quite a few of the family as well.

Anyway. Long story short, her grand-niece had just given birth exactly a month ago and now has a beautiful baby girl. Sounds nice at first glance, but then you delve a bit more and then you find out that she got pregnant at 18/19, and the man who fathered the child hasn’t done anything more for the baby other than to contribute his DNA. Pfft. Whilst the grand-niece still lives with him, he’s not done a single feed or offered to help her with anything. All he does is mooch about the house and watch telly – or if he does go out, go drinking with a bunch of guys.

Heck, even while she was in labour, he kept talking about how he couldn’t really stay for the whole birth. Now what kind of a father would do that? (Apart from a terrible one, that is.)

Leave the slob, perhaps? Not as simple. When you’ve grown up without having your father, you’d want your kid to not go through the same thing – which is why she’s refusing to totally split up with the guy.

But she’s wiped, and the guy’s apathy is taking its toll. So she’s also here at Jenny’s with us along with the baby to have a break. She’s not entirely in the pink of health, but at least the baby’s doing fine and she’s coping well with feeding, bathing and clothing her. Sometimes, though, I wonder if the baby really picks up on her mother’s stress and all; because she can “scream” a fair bit for a fair amount of time!

Then again, she’s only 4 weeks old. Most times, though, the baby just looks so adorable. Like she hasn’t got a care in the world apart from her business (to gurgle, poop, cry, sleep and all. xD)

You know, even though it’s not really any of my business, I do feel a bit mixed for the baby. I feel sorry for her that she may not be as lucky to have a firm father figure in her life. No one knows what the grandniece is going to do about that good-for-nothing. But at the same time, I also feel happy for the baby; knowing that her mum, although not the best cookie there is (that’s another story), is growing up and taking charge of her own life as well as the baby’s. If anything, she’ll be a great mother. She’s young, indeed, and probably scared sh*tless, but she’s doing well. I just sympathize that she hasn’t got support from the father – although Jenny and her husband are doing all they can for her (whilst having me as a lodger – what a handful! :D)

Thankfully, the grandniece has been booked in for counselling soon – so maybe she can decide if she wants to take charge and kick the loser dad out, try to work things out, or…well. I dunno.

But I do know I’m grateful – I’m luckier by far.

I love you, Daddy.

I’m not sure if it’s just me, or if I’m just one of those people “doomed” to have atypical friendships and social circles. Actually, I wouldn’t consider them atypical; but they’re definitely not what any old Joe/Jane would expect to have to go through. Not all of this, anyway.

For starters, I’m not part of a stereotypical high school clique; or just any old clique per se. That’s probably because I’m not 1) preppy 2) popular 3) a cheerleader 4) uber-nerdy 5) uber-AZN (as they would refer to themselves) or 6) a musical hermit. I love having my cake and eating it as well; so I’m involved in a good mix of stuff and talk to a lot of people. Which is what they never really understand about me. -_- If I were to actually follow personalities on TV shows, I think I’d be pretty much an Inbetweener (reference to E4′s hit comedy series The Inbetweeners; a bunch of students not cool enough to be popular but not nerdy enough to be geeks.)

Moving on – except for some treasured few, I seem to have a notorious track record for not getting along with peers of my age/year group. Juniors and seniors are all right, and I’m (touch wood) brilliant with kids and adults. However, try as I may, people from my year group just don’t take a shine to me. This became a lot more evident when I went to England – and know what? It’s actually not my fault that we don’t get on; Mr Marshman (my houseparent) reckons it’s just a case of different intellectual levels (so sue me if I don’t feel like comparing Daniel Radcliffe with Jeremy Sumpter – go ahead if you will; I just don’t really want to participate per se, thanks.) Perhaps I just have to be a bit more patient – people change and grow up more during their late teenage years.

The final thing – which has also ended up being a source of jibes – is the fact that I get on better with lads than chicas. I won’t lie and say that it’s better to share certain things with members of your own sex – even though I hate stereotypes, most of the girls around me are complete b****es. When it comes to friendly banter, more often than not, it’s guys that I tend to have it with. And unsurprisingly, some the dudes I hang out with happen to be the people I go to with my light worries. I must admit I do stay away from the popular ones, though; they tend to be very jock-ish characters without the ability to sustain a convo.
Not to say that I don’t get along with girls full stop. My two oldest best friends are girls I’ve known since primary school who are 1) living miles away from me and 2) are of a totally different background compared to mine. One doesn’t speak English as her first language either.

So far, these are the sort of things that I’ve grown to get used to – which other people sometimes condemn as an “abnormal social life”. Hopefully you agree with me. There are, however, certain not-so-typical friendships I’ve experienced in my teen years; some of which I’m still trying to get a clue on.

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